A Call in Silence

It was only a few months ago when we last spoke on the phone for almost four hours, rambling about anything from office affairs to current issues to "Munich". The next day: walking down the street, holding hands, small talks -- I can't even remember what we were chatting about, since it was the kiss that made the day.

The kiss.

Feeling your lips softly touching mine, the five seconds of bliss and passion and warmth. It was brief, yes. Yet the memory left a trail of joy, until a shocking scene brought it down. It was my fault, I think, letting it ruin that tiny corner of my heart. I should've built a fortress at the first place, knowing how vulnerable I was when it came to you.

Yes, time finally did heal the pain.

But in a way it also snatched our friendship.

Why? Why can't I call you at lunch time, or grab you for a cup of capuccino, like we used to do? Why can't I ring you at nights, hearing your stories, debating your ideas (oh, you are so stubborn! heheh..), gossipping our friends? Why can't I ask you to go to a movie without second thought? Why can't we plan a trip together again?

I guess I should cast aside the pride, eh? The fear of rejection has become my biggest enemy. It pulled me away from you. From a good companion.

But... but will you also take my hand? I'm still a bit worried that you will stand still there and I will be left here, feeling denied. I am not that strong, not yet. Somehow, though, I feel like you are looking at me from the distance, calling me in silence.