Nature's Call?

Lately I've had the strangest feeling. (Quoting Mr. Richie).

I want my own offspring.
I'm dreaming of taking care of a newborn, my flesh and blood. The apple of my eye.
I'm picturing myself going home in a rush, can hardly wait to see the cute little one in need of my help, my arms, my very presence.

Nature's call? Maybe. Funny, because I thought I've past that stage. Well, though I've always liked children and babies, I don't think I'm mature enough -- mental wise -- to be a good mom (despite my "mature" age), hehehe... I'm the poster girl for disorganization, for a start! I've always had this firm belief that parents should be role models for their children -- and with me being a careless person and everything else, how could I fulfill this task? (Oh, this thought is already so depressing!)

Second, I still can't figure out how I'm going to have one. Tube baby? Sperm donor? Or the more exciting, traditional way: one night of fun. The latter one is so tempting, but that would definitely be the last choice - I've to make sure that I'm fertile at that time and it has to be safe. Chances are, I have to find a virgin, which is even rarer in my age group, and I might end up getting busted for devirginizing an underager!

I haven't even given a thorough observation on the social factor: our so-called values. Our hypocrite society is still totally resentful of a single women conceiving her own baby. And I am not so much of a breakthrough person. Not yet.

Of course, I could always opt for the safest, and the most noble choice: adopting a child of a disadvantaged family. But why oh why this option doesn't really attract me? Hm, perhaps I've lost my compassion.

I've even come to lunatic ideas, like putting on a banner in my friendster page: "WANTED: A MAN TO BEGET A BABY. NO STRINGS ATTACHED. CALL 202*******". I don't have to spare some time to write down an ad, prospective males can already check out my profile. Or simply accept the first marriage proposal, ANY marriage proposal. Huhuhu. Things that I wouldn't normally do, ever.

But, who knows? I completely understand how impulsive I can be at times! Though, like all other moodswingers in the world, I could regret it later, hehehe...

19 comments:

nananias said...

I might end up getting busted for devirginizing an underager!

loh loh loh itu harusnya ngag surprising dong. kan emang wanita-wanita dewasa sungguh menggoda mwihihihi..

eh eh bukan hipokrit, tapi ini negara beragama gitu looh *tolong dibaca dengan nada sinis yah! wink*

yang punya said...

hahahhaa... kita kan sama2 tau, eda!*knowing wink*

jadi karena negara beragama ya? hihhi.. kalo gitu mustinya semua universitas dikasih embel2 "beragama" juga, kayak mustopo itu loh, hehehe.. *no offense terhadap lulusan mustopo loh! peace!*

Dinda said...

kalo gw mah: sperm bank!
dulu ya, pernah me and my friend 'bercita-cita', kalo seandainya gak ada cowok yang worth buat me and her, maka kita akan ke sperm bank, milih2 katalog, dan raise our own child. terus tinggalnya di luar negeri. gak perlu di negara 'beragama' ini, hehehe...

'ka said...

u know what? if u feel like it, then u should go for it... screw those people who can only talk talk and talk... they don't go thru what you go thru. only YOU who knows who YOU are and what you really want.

life is short... the perfect man might or might never appear. then what? IF you wanna have a baby and you KNOW that you're ready for it, then hey, why the hell not?

yang punya said...

Dinda: tau gak, I think it's becoming a trend nowadays (young women wanting to have children with or without a partner). Abis makin banyak yg seperti itu gw temui.


'Ka: the thing is, I'm still not sure. Have to really, really think about it. Not necessarily because I fear (Indonesian) people perception, but more importantly I've to make sure that this is what I want, and that I'm ready for that.

silverlines said...

I tend to go for 'Ka's option. Besides, it's our life to go on with, not the society's.
And you're not living in this 'negara beragama' anyway, at the moment, right ?
Chosing the right father to conceive is another story ;-)

yang punya said...

Silvergirl: True, I'm not living in the negara beragama, but I will be going home there in 2008 (which is only 2 years ahead!) Choosing the right father? Hihihihi... That's real tough question, 'cause I'm not into relationships right now. And somehow I'm quite pessimistic about my luck with men, hahaha... ("good man" that is. not "any man"!)

Sunny said said...

But just like Christina Aguilera said in her Stripped thank-you note (yes, I listen to her, go on laugh! =))), GOOD GUYS DO EXIST. Look how she end up marrying Jordan Aguilera, I mean Bratman. Jordan Bratman, her executive producer hubby.

Lho kok malah bergossip. =))

Ellen, if u're not REALLY sure, don't go thru it YET. Having a child, especially not ur own, will take MUCH MORE responsibility. Tapi kalo setelah dipikir berulang2 kali dan u still want it, and the most important is, u're ready for any consequences caused by it, well, go for it girl. Having a child will make u never see the world in the same way again.

okke said...

seperti kata dinda...

gimana kalo bank sperma?
tapi pastikan bahwa asal-usul sperma tersebut berkwaliteet..

hihihihiy...

silverlines said...

I was actually speaking about biological father, sperm bank kind of thing. Hehehe.

sontoloyo said...

wah ini diskusi yang menarik nih.
Gue quote buat blog gue yah ihihihihihiihi...mengenai having a baby, you know i will always support you what ever your decision.
Tapi jangan pernah menyerah finding the right man...blom 40 kan ? santai ajah ahahahhahahahaha...kaga santai2 bener sih...tapi give it a thought...long thought...2 years at least.

yang punya said...

Girl: it's absolutely true. I'm not in a rush either. I'm still contemplating, calculating it :). I've mentioned in the post that I still doubt my "mothering" capability, right? ;)

Okke: gw gak pernah ke sperm bank. Emang bener ada katalog yah? :D

Silverlines: ooohh.. hahahah! Well, that makes it even easier!

Sondi: for me, finding the right man doesnt necessarily go in line with having a baby. Yeah, it would be great if I can conceive a baby of a man I love and who loves me back, but u know, sometimes u can't have a cake and eat it too! hehehe...

'ka said...

well... go for the 'natural sperm bank' ;) 'cuz for sure you KNOW what 'n how he is.....

PLUS... there's nothing wrong for a girl to get her groove on...

as indonesian saying... 'sambil menyelam minum aerrrr' :D

sontoloyo said...

Sperm bank tentu ada katalognya dong...at least that's what i thought.
Sperma itu dari laki2 ethnic apa,umur brapa,tampangnya kaya apa,pendidikannya gimana...begitu bukan katalognya ?

Biru said...

kalau udah siap mental dan material sih jalanin aja non,dulu sebelum married aku pgn adopsi ( semua larang) katanya mending punya anak sendiri.

sekarang aq punya anak dr darah dagingku sendiri,berat jd single mom,tp asik..jd ada hiburan dan dan kekuatan kalo lg ribet

Apey said...

Jeng...mosok iya udah sampe listing di sperm bank ? hahaha..

mpokb said...

gubraks.. since when one night of fun become a traditional way? :D
having a baby is one thing. raising it is another.. *mbayangin*

merlyna lim said...

this posting is truly amusing. love it.
btw, if you have decided to get a baby through sperm donor, let's go to sperm bank together. I looked at LA sperm bank database. Check this out: "A phd student at Stanford, Greek, 6 feet, like to travel, and play sax" sounds ideal, doesn't it? :D

yang punya said...

Mer: Ada?? DI MANA??????? *histeris*