Satu Saat Kau Akan Mencintaiku

s0ndi : dah liat blog baru gue ?
s0ndi: heheheheheh
lenje : belom...
lenje : entar gw liat dulu...
s0ndi : gara2 gue sebel sama cewe yang selalu nanya "elo sayang gue ga?"
s0ndi : BETE
s0ndi : mendingan lihat aja apa yang gue lakukan...
lenje : huahahaha...
lenje : cw loe ya???
s0ndi : sebel
s0ndi : bukan
s0ndi : heheheh itu masalahnya
lenje : LOH!
s0ndi : heheheheheh
lenje : emang ngebingungin ya?
s0ndi : dia mau jadi cewe gue...
s0ndi : gue kaga bisa janji apa2
s0ndi : gue bilang...elo lihat ajah apa yang gue lakukan
s0ndi : you will have the idea
lenje : wakakakkakaka...
s0ndi : observe gitu lohhh
lenje : tau gak son... gw punya temen yg kejadiannya persis kayak elo
s0ndi : huaaaa
s0ndi : suruh dia baca blog gue
lenje : justru itu gw mo cerita sama elo
lenje : ceritanya temen gw nih pernah jadian sama seorang cewek.. dia ngerasa gak klop
s0ndi : trus
lenje : terus dia pacaran sama cewek lain... tapi cewek yg pertama tetap keukeuh mo sama dia
s0ndi : hmmm...
s0ndi : trus ?
s0ndi : selingkuh doong ?
lenje : temen gw mulai dari cara halus menghindar, sampe terang2an ngomong ke cewek pertama itu bahwa dia ngerasa gak cocok... tapi si cw tetep super optimis dengan bilang: "lo jalanin aja dulu ama gw. satu saat lo akan mencintai gw."
lenje : gile gw takjub sama tuh cewek
s0ndi : huaaaaaaaaaa
lenje : very determined
s0ndi : maju terus pantang mundur merdeka !!!
s0ndi : hehehehe
lenje : u know what happened? finally they got married
s0ndi : cocok buat jadi saksi yehova
s0ndi : kakakkakaakk
lenje : bukan karena temen gw itu akhirnya cinta sama sang cewek.. tapi karena dia capek menghindar...
lenje : kekkekekekkeke..
lenje : dan dia merasa bahwa di umur sekarang dia udah males cari2 yg baru

....

Kegigihan orang dalam mengejar cinta membuat saya kagum (hebat, tak pantang menyerah). Bertanya-tanya (kenapa dia begitu bersemangat? Apakah yang dikejar pantas untuk... dikejar?). Sirik (seandainya saya punya kenekatan yang sama...). Sebal (heran, masih tebal muka saja!).

Bila yang melakukan pengejaran itu adalah seorang perempuan, yang notabene masih menderita diskriminasi sosial dari masyarakat kita sehingga harus bersiap-siap memperoleh label negatif dari orang lain, maka saya harus mengacungkan dua jempol padanya. Terlepas dari soal pada siapa saya bersimpati (berhubung yang menjadi "korban" di sini adalah salah satu teman dekat saya), saya harus mengakui bahwa akhirnya dia memperoleh apa yang diinginkannya. Apakah teman saya pada akhirnya akan mencintainya, kita lihat saja nanti. Yang penting dia sudah memenangkan langkah pertama. Dan itu adalah langkah yang besar.

How to Get A Mate (in a Shallow Way)

Sondi The Sontoloyo Guy has posted a series of tips on "How to Get a Guy". Reading it, I was both a bit disturbed and amused. Here they are:

1.Have long hair. A Typical man like to see woman with a long hair.If a long haired woman walk in front of a may, man tend to like to see her face.

2. Be clean and smell nice. Woman who have a clean body and nice smell tend to get a man attention.You don't have to bathe yourself with perfume,but smell nice is not a pain also.

3. Work yourself out. Nice and lean body will increase the chance a man will look at you.So shake your bun...hun !

4. Wear nice outfit. Try to wear the outfit that you look best, it doesn't have to be open everywhere but make sure it show's the best of you.It doesn't have to be expensive also.

5. Read books and learn new things. It's true that most men only see woman from physical appearance,but woman with ample of knowledge sure can make a man feel comfortable with.Especially when woman know the world of man (mechanics,Sports,games and Science).It's really a plus sign for man.

6. Increase your self-respect and throw your self-pity attitude. It's a soft skill a woman must master if she want's to get a man for herself.Woman tend to wait for something to come then act more agressively.

Finally, in getting a man you must use your will and your wit alone."

I already got his permission to put them all here. The reason I do it is because I want to share with you readers my comment to this bloody post.

I came up with a new list of tips on "How to Get a Girl":

1. Be tall, light-colored skinned, well built (spend quality time at the gym always works, babe).

2. Bring your expensive car.

3. Show off your platinum credit cards.

4. Carry expensive gadgets (iPods, PDAs, 8.0 MPixel cameras, Nokia 9500s, iBooks) but fix a "I'm-more-technologically-advanced-than-ordinary-Indonesians-and-I-don't-care-if-people-can-see-that" look on your face. More importantly, pretend that you don't realize people are staring at those gadgets.

5. Drink WINE or CHAMPAGNE (not beer, mind you!)

6. Quote -- or even better, invent -- a joke and make everyone laugh their hearts out.

7. Say "hi" to everyone you bump into, especially when you are in a popular crowd (celebrities and stuff). Believe me, even the famous people LOVE it when they are recognized :P.

8. Have, in your car, at least one thick book about business, management, leadership -- any title that indicates you are somehow in a management level.

In short: STYLE, STYLE, STYLE.

Hehehehe...

I should like to conclude this by sending message to that special guy out there, who might read this as well:

It's not me, Sayang. It's my dark side. And certainly my shallow one. But I am into you, you know. Peace!

Tentang Senyum

Sudah beberapa saat lamanya saya ingin mengirimkan pesan pada seorang teman: "Kamu tahu, kamu manis. Tapi kenapa kamu jarang tampak tersenyum dalam gambar-gambarmu? (Termasuk ketika kamu sedang bersama dengan gadis-gadis cantik kekasihmu, yang selalu tersenyum lebar menatap kamera, seakan ingin membagikan kebahagiaan mereka pada dunia). Padahal kamu punya senyum yang manis dan menyenangkan. Ayo, lebih banyak senyum!"

Tapi saya khawatir bila saya melontarkan kata-kata tersebut padanya dia malah berusaha menebak-nebak apa yang sebenarnya saya maksud, dengan kecurigaan bahwa perempuan pada umumnya gemar menggunakan kata-kata bersayap sembari berharap lawan bicaranya dapat segera memahami maksudnya. Atau yang lebih parah lagi, menarik kesimpulan sepihak mengapa saya memberikan usulan demikian.

Di sisi lain, ada kemungkinan kesukaan memasang ekspresi yang cenderung serius di depan kamera justru karena yang bersangkutan merasa bahwa memang itulah sudut lihat yang paling baik. Saya tahu banyak pesohor maupun bukan pesohor yang selalu yakin bahwa mereka tampak lebih menarik dalam pose tertentu. Ada yang selalu menggerai rambutnya di sebelah kiri, ada yang hanya mau dipotret dari sebelah kanan... dan tentunya ada yang merasa tampak lebih berwibawa dengan raut serius, hehehehe...

Saya sendiri lebih suka dipotret dalam keadaan tersenyum atau tertawa. Dengan alasan yang sama: muka serius saya tidak fotogenik. Tapi saya juga meyakini, bahwa ekspresi ceria akan selalu dapat menyenangkan diri sendiri maupun orang lain. Mungkin kecuali musuh-musuh saya.

Lalu kenapa saya memasang foto Kate Hudson ini? Karena dia salah seorang perempuan dengan senyum dan tawa paling menawan. Dia menyadari itu, sehingga dalam hampir semua gambarnya dia tampil dengan pesona tawanya.

O ya, saya juga yakin bahwa ekspresi tawa akan selalu membuat seseorang kelihatan lebih menarik, walaupun tanpa gigi. Apalagi bila tawa itu tawa yang tulus dan riang.

Ayo senyum!

Dengarkanlah Calon Pemimpin Masa Depan Kita!

Mungkin tidak banyak yang tahu bahwa tanggal 23 Juli adalah Hari Anak Nasional. Sekiranya saya tidak bekerja di KBRI pun -- yang merayakan Hari tersebut dengan serangkaian kegiatan untuk anak-anak dan remaja -- sudah pasti saya akan melewatkan tanggal ini.

Dari sekian banyak acara yang dirancang dalam rangka Hari Anak Nasional, salah satu yang cukup banyak diminati oleh anak-anak Indonesia yang berdomisili di Washington DC dan sekitarnya, dan orang tua mereka (!), adalah lomba menulis esai pendek. Berdasarkan pengamatan saya, ada beberapa hal yang menjadi faktor cukup tingginya tingkat keikutsertaan anak-anak dan remaja dalam lomba ini:

1. Sistem pendidikan di AS yang mendorong para muridnya untuk menuangkan pikiran dalam tulisan, serta untuk memiliki inisiatif tinggi.

2. Iming-iming hadiah yang disediakan panitia untuk para juara.

3. Ambisi para orang tua (khususnya yang bekerja di KBRI) agar anak-anak mereka berpartisipasi dalam sebanyak mungkin acara.

4. Karena tulisan harus dibuat di tempat (tidak boleh disiapkan dari rumah), kesempatan tersebut digunakan juga untuk duduk berdekat-dekatan selama kurang lebih dua jam dengan yang ditaksir (yang kebetulan ikut kompetisi ini). Menang bukan tujuan, tentunya, yang terpenting kepuasan batin terpenuhi, hehehe...

Salah satu topik yang disediakan panitia tahun ini adalah: "Bila saya menjadi presiden Indonesia". Para peserta dipersilakan memilih sendiri, menggunakan Bahasa Indonesia atau Bahasa Inggris.

Tulisan seorang peserta berumur 11 tahun, Iona Sastromihardjo, sangat mengesankan saya, sehingga saya memutuskan untuk memuatnya di sini. O ya, walaupun blog ini merupakan ruang publik, tapi saya berharap mereka yang membacanya dan sama terkesan dengan saya dapat ikut menjaga hak kekayaan intelektual gadis cilik ini.

My 10 Presidential Rules

Most adults don't take kids seriously. Well, yes, they say they looove kids. They kiss babies on TV. They pat our heads and tell us how cute we look. But try speaking to an adult, they'll say "Be quiet!" before we even open our mouth. And when we refuse to be quiet, they'll scream back at us "Later, later, later! Can't you see I'm busy?"

Adults only listen to other adults. In Indonesia it's even worse. It's like a ladder. Kids have to listen to their parents and teachers. Their parents and teachers have to listen to their bosses. Their bosses have to listen to the much bigger bosses. And the biggest boss of all doesn't know what's going on down below because all those little people underneath the ladder never get the chance to speak.

We kids know a lot because we have big ears and big eyes. We are everywhere. We notice everything small that most adults don't have time to notice. Also, we kids see things differently. We don't get mad when the porcelain plates break. Of course porcelains break, they are not plastic. So if only adults would treat us seriously, we could contribute a lot to the adult world.

Because in Indonesia it is cultural that people only listen to the biggest boss, the only way to change this is to become the biggest boss ourself [sic]. If I were the president of Indonesia, I would pass a law that tells every adult in the country to follow these ten rules:

1. Set aside at least one hour a day to listen to what your kids have to say

2. If your kid happens to be the shy type, be active, ask more questions

3. If your kids happens to be the weird type, be alert, he might be imitating you

4. Don't use baby language when talking to your kids (We are not that dumb!)

5. Discuss your problems with your kids (We can come up with fresh solutions!)

6. Take your kids to different places, show them different kinds of people and foods [sic]

7. Allow your kids to learn more about the stuff they really like (Buy them books, DVD's, computer programs, video games)

8. Don't force your kids to be like other kids. (Einstein wasn't like other kids in his neighborhood)

9. Ask your kid how he wants to spend his life when he grows up.

10. Ask him what he expects from his parents to get him there.

"The child is the father of the man" says William Wordsworth the poet. It means that an adult can learn many things from listening to a kid.

If I become the president of Indonesia, I will make sure that each of my ministers create a program where kids can develop their true talents. And not what their parents and teachers tell them to develop. If I have a dozen ministers, there will [sic] a dozen such true programs for every Indonesian kid from Sabang to Merauke. The minister with the best program will be my successor as president.

Percayalah, saya menuliskan kembali karya di atas sambil kerap tersenyum. Tata bahasanya hampir sempurna, dengan gagasan-gagasan orisinal yang bernuansakan kepolosan kanak-kanak namun tetap brilian. Dan saya setuju bahwa kita bisa belajar banyak dari mereka: belajar untuk lebih menikmati hidup, belajar untuk tidak mencemaskan hal-hal kecil yang tidak perlu dikuatirkan, belajar untuk melihat mereka sebagai pribadi tersendiri dan bukannya semata refleksi diri kita ataupun keinginan kita.

Semoga kita juga belajar mendengarkan anak-anak kita. Selamat Hari Anak Nasional untuk semua anak Indonesia.

UPDATE:

Ternyata si kecil-cerdas Iona memiliki website sendiri, yang bisa dilihat di sini.

Loving for Sentimental Reasons

I love you for sentimental reasons
I hope you do believe me
I'll give you my heart

I love you and you alone were meant for me
Please give your loving heart to me
And say we'll never part

I think of you every morning
Dream of you every night
Darling, I'm never lonely
Whenever you are in sight

I love you for sentimental reasons
I hope you do believe me
I've given you my heart


We often love for sentimental reasons, for longing to be loved, for feeling completed, for the company of somebody else. Many times this leads to something unhealthy: we let ourselves be submissive to the one we love. Or worse, we manipulate those who love us. All, I believe, are because of our inner fear of being left alone in this cruel world. We build our fortress in the name of love for our emotional protection. In the end, love stories reflect mankind's endless efforts to survive. But I am convinced that it will never make us happy. Because we can only be fulfilled when we can love the way it should be: the love that liberates, not binds. The love that gives, not takes.

(A note for a woman that I admire from afar. You deserve more, girl!)

About My Partner :)

I was the cutie bridesmaid for her mom's wedding. I know her since her baby years. I once spent my school holiday in her house, and I remember we got along very well despite our age gap. I was already a fourth grader, she and her younger sister were even not in kindergarten yet! But it was one memorable holiday.

Since we lived in different cities, I only watched her from afar. Sometimes I heard comments how similar she was to the little me: the way we talked, our serak-serak basah voice, how we would sink ourselves in books, and so on. And yes, once in a while when I did have the opportunity to meet her, I could see my reflection in her.

Then I saw the almost completely changed her after she was already in high school. She was stunningly pretty, very feminine, and looked very mature and pulled together. We met in family gatherings (you can imagine how often, I'm Batak!), family weddings, etc. But it is only after we live together here that I get to know her better. We apparently share a lot of things, though we are in totally opposing poles when it comes to certain issues. Practically we have become an item, a "couple": I pay the rents and bills, she takes care of the house, hehehe... She is also my best friend, with whom I talk about problems, asks for advices, seeks opinions. I trust her wisdom and maturity.

We went out last night to celebrate her birthday. It was fun. Though we'd only take the ordinary route (i.e. downtown), we acted like we were going somewhere fancy. We wore nice clothes, glowing make up, pointed and high heel shoes, cute bags. We picked an Italian restaurant (I've been dreaming about lasagna lately), and though we had to wait for half an hour to get a table, it was a perfect choice. The light was dim, our table was near the window where we could see the rain pouring down outside, and light jazz music aired the room, accentuated by the voices of people talking. The ambience was superb. And of course, as usual, we had a great conversation.

Happy birthday to you, my lovely niece. I hope you enjoyed our "girls' night out" as much as I did, and I do hope that this special day of yours could jollify your time. Thank you for being my best friend, and I pray always for you.

She Says, He Says

"What do you like about me?"

She says:

"I like your great sense of humor
I like your taste of music
I like your intelligence
I like your self confidence
I like the way you talk
I like your attentiveness
I like the way you love the apple of your eyes
I like the way you make me feel as a woman..."

He says:

"I like your unpretentiousness, which I miss every now and then;
I like it that we speak the same language and think in tandem;
I like you because you make me feel comfortable with myself and you, of course; I don't need to be somebody else..."

Cinderella: Post Wedding Days

My friend Sondi's blog is full of brain-tickling comments on life and love; the latter could particulary be attributed to his neverending search of a soulmate, or so he says. Well, I can only feel sorry for him hehehehe... Anyway, I love some of his progressive though not necessarily nouveau ideas, like when he decides to refer God as a "She", emphasizing that it will only serve humankind and MEN well, as men or at least the Masculine Entity will not be forever blamed for poverty, disease and war that still exist -- in contrast with the Feminine Entity which is always associated with peace, tenderness, and so forth. (Gosh, this is frustrating. Where do I stand? I've started to feel like a frog). By the way, does this long sentence give you nausea? It does to me :P.

His recent posting begins with a very beautiful princess who seems to have everything, from great castle, lovely children and good husband, until she finds out that the prince is having an affair with another woman, so the princess tries to get even by trying to seduce a long forgotten love of hers. OK, so he is actually writing something about marriage in general, but I'm way more interested in what happens to Cinderella AFTER her dreamy wedding day.

I've been having this storyline of Cinderella's post wedding days in my head. Cinderella has been growing bored with the Prince Charming, who turns out to be a lazy, spoiled, full-of-himself, immature dude protected by Papa King. Cinderella dreams about her past, enslaved times, when she had to get up at dawn and sleep very late, servicing insatiable step family members, whom somehow she now misses very much. They might act like tyrants, unbelievably demanding, but they were lively and high-spirited. Their presence is so strong compared to the cold, well mannered, and stiff-faced palace's staff. Their constant yellings, so annoying in the past, are what she's craving for at the moment. The small and dirty attic feels more refreshing than this spacious bedroom, so large it can accommodate twenty more people. But so soulless at the same time.

The most disappointing thing apparently is the Prince Charming himself. Cinderella cannot stop the thought that she -- along with thousands of women all over the country, and perhaps from neighbouring lands as well -- was entrapped in carefully crafted public image of the Prince. The poor bloke has nothing beyond his look, which after a few months is not even charming anymore. And despite his beautiful body -- the only temple he religiously cares for and about -- his performance in bed is blah; Cinderella would rather use her imagination and fingers.

This plot can develop into a more provocative scenario, such as Cinderella eyeing the handsome gardener (think "Desperate Housewives"). Or, worse, falling for the charismatic King, her father-in-law. After all, Cinderella lost her dad when she was still a baby, it is understandable that she looks for some father figure. Oooh... I already have a handful stock of kinky stories!

Sondi -- being a man, of course -- prefers to get the Prince Charming cheating on Cinderella first. In retaliation Cinderella will try to seduce her ex-lover (which could be the gardener, of course), and ends up being so attached to this lover, who fulfills her ego and desire.

The step family will keep a close watch on her; they still can't get over their fury on her luck. And they are formulating a wicked plan to get back on her, to make her regret her decision to accept Fairy Godmother's generous offer.

Hm, I'd better start considering the prospect of being a scriptwriter. This one surely is good material for soaps or sinetrons.

When You Say You Love Me....

Like the sound of silence calling,
I hear your voice and suddenly
I'm falling, lost in a dream.
Like the echoes of our souls are meeting,
You say those words and my heart stops beating.
I wonder what it means.
What could it be that comes over me?
At times I can't move.
At times I can hardly breathe.

When you say you love me
The world goes still, so still inside and
When you say you love me
For a moment, there's no one else alive

You're the one I've always thought of.
I don't know how, but I feel sheltered in your love.
You're where I belong.
And when you're with me if I close my eyes,
There are times I swear I feel like I can fly
For a moment in time.
Somewhere between the Heavens and Earth ,
And frozen in time, Oh when you say those words.

When you say you love me
The world goes still, so still inside and
When you say you love me
For a moment, there's no one else alive

And this journey that we're on.
How far we've come and I celebrate every moment.
And when you say you love me,
That's all you have to say.
I'll always feel this way.

When you say you love me
The world goes still, so still inside and
When you say you love me
In that moment,I know why I'm alive

When you say you love me.
When you say you love me.
Do you know how I love you?

... Apalagi yang menyanyi Josh Groban.....



Mon ami: thank you for playing that song, although I know it is actually not your kind of music. Have a blasting time in the most romantic city in the world, and
essayez votre chance avec les filles françaises là, bien? And next time, no more name calling (literally!), ok?